Without My Soldier
by Fangrules
Summary: Sequel to War. Max has live through the days without the mysterious soldier she met at the camp with only letters to tell her hes still alive, as this continues she finds herself falling for him but as her mother always said - its dangerous to love the doomed
1. Sam

**Hi guys, I re-uploaded this and added a whole bunch of stuff, if you've read this before I've marked where I've added on from with smily faces e.g. :-)**

Max has live through the days without the mysterious soldier she met at the camp with only letters to tell her he's still alive, as this continues she finds herself falling for him but as her mother always said, it's dangerous to love the doomed.

The car ride so far had been very quiet besides Nudge's singing to the songs on the radio. Both girls were so lost in their thoughts that it was as if the world around them had disappeared.

It was only about three blocks from their street that Nudge decided to voice the question that had been niggling at the back of her mind four the last twenty minutes. "So what did you do last night?"

"Hm?" Max replied looking over at her friend in confusion.

"What did you do last night?" Nudge repeated with a laugh looking over at Max with a calculating expression.

Max shrugged to brush it off but by the small smile that appeared Nudge guessed that something had indeed happened.

Nudge's jaw dropped and her eyes grew wide, the first thing that came to mind most definitely didn't sound like Max. "You didn't!" She gasped jamming her foot on the brakes causing the car to come to an abrupt halt in the middle of the street.

Max lurched forward in surprise and spun to face her friend, "What?" She asked in confusion but the second she took in Nudge's expression she started shaking her head furiously, "No! No! Geeze! What is with you and sex!" She demanded trying hard to fight back the blush she knew was rising.

Nudge looked slightly relieved and slightly disappointed at the same time and crossed her arms over her chest in defence, "You can't blame me, we just came back from an army base camp and you disappeared last night! One second you're there the next you and Fang are gone! What else was I supposed to think?"

Max frowned in confusion, "How do you know his name's Fang?" she enquired not remembering telling her friend that yet.

Nudge sighed and shook her head, "Iggy knows him. Apparently they met on the bus from Arizona." She explained turning in her seat to look at Max properly, "So are you going to answer my question or not?"

"Nothing happened, alright?" Max said slowly to make sure Nudge understood that she wasn't playing games.

Nudge waved that off and shot out her next question, "Alright then, if nothing happened then where'd you go last night?"

Max paused to contemplate her answer, a part of her wanted to keep what had happened between her and Fang a secret and the other was dying to tell her friend about it. She decided to settle with keeping most of it to herself and only telling Nudge enough to stop her jumping to conclusions, "We went to the beach." She hoped Nudge would be satisfied with that and would leave her to think about the rest of it, to sort everything out but of course that wasn't going to happen.

Nudge let out a squeal and grinned, "The beach? That is so cute! What did you do?" She probed jumping up and down in her seat.

Max rolled her eyes and quickly replayed the night to find something that she could tell Nudge without revealing too much. She most definitely wasn't going to tell her about what Fang had allowed her to see, that was something she'd die first before telling anyone but as the night rolled through her mind she couldn't find anything she actually _wanted_ to tell Nudge, "I really don't want to talk about it right now." She decided to reply and then added quickly before Nudge could ask another question, "What happened with you and Iggy?"

All suspicion disappeared from Nudge's face the second Iggy's name was mentioned and she launched into a very detailed account of the night before.

"Oh he's so amazing, Max." She concluded and sighed dreamily.

Max smiled at her friend, she really was a hopeless romantic. Nudge had had countless boyfriends over the years and almost every single one she'd claimed to love no matter how short the relationship was and this was no different but Max knew that this time it wouldn't end with a simple breakup where Nudge could eat a tub of Ben & Jerry's and forget about him. This time it would end with death.

Max's heart sank at the thought; it really was a stupid idea to give him her address, to ask him to write to her. Getting too close to soldiers never ended well. She felt sick at the thought that Fang would never come back.  
>"Hello? Maaaax!" Nudge called waving a hand in front of her friend's face.<p>

Max blinked at her a few times, finally coming out of her thoughts.

"Are you ok? You look kinda sick." Nudge hesitantly said taking in Max's pale face.

Max took a few breaths and offered Nudge a small smile, "I'm fine." She assured patting Nudge's hand for good measure, "What's the time?"

Nudge glanced down at her watch and frowned, "Half seven."

Max groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose, "Mom is going to _kill_ me if we don't get back. _Now_!"

xXx

Max quickly clambered in through her bedroom window and hurriedly threw back the covers pulling her sand encrusted clothes off at the same time and pulled on her nightgown. She jumped into bed and squeezed her eyes shut just in time for her mother to open the door.

Her heart thumped loudly in her chest and Max prayed that her mother wouldn't be able to tell. She opened her mouth to regulate her breathing and relaxed all her features even letting out little snores to complete the effect.

She heard her mother creeping around the room and seconds later the curtains to her balcony were thrown open, the sun hitting her directly in the face.

She waited a few seconds before letting out a groan and throwing her arm to hide her eyes from the light like she normally would when she was woken up that way.

She heard a tinkling laugh and peeking up to find Ella her younger sister grinning down at her. "You went out last night." She announced and Max's eyes shot open, her mouth open and ready to beg for her not to tell mom but Ella cut her off, "Don't worry silly, I won't tell mom." She chuckled sitting on the edge of the bed.

"How'd you know?" Max asked sitting up and leaning against the detailed headboard of her four-poster bed.

Ella pointed to the edge of Max's shirt peeking out from under the bed, the gold sand standing out on the dark blue material. "Rather obvious if I say so myself."

Max pushed the clothes fully under the bed and gave Ella a smile.

"I take it by the amount of sand and the goofy smile on your face you went to the army camp." Ella mused, picking at the duvet with her purple nails.

Max chuckled, "Is it really that obvious?" She ran a hand through her hair and winced when she tugged at a very stubborn knot.

Ella nodded, "Yep, you smell like salt."

Max threw a pillow at her sister's head and got out of the bed, "I'm going to go have a shower." She announced dodging the pillow Ella flung back at her.

Max stepped into the blazing hot water and let it beat out the tense muscles in her back, her thoughts wandered back to Fang again for the umpteenth time since she'd left the camp and if he would be ok. She would give anything the keep him safe. It sounded so strange to want a stranger to live so badly but she couldn't seem to forget about him. She opened her eyes, the shower waking her up fully and her eyes landed on something around her wrist.

She shook her head and smiled, realising how Ella had guessed that she'd been at the army camp. Fang's dog-tags were still wrapped around her wrist.

When Max returned to her bedroom Ella was gone and she dug in her chest of drawers for the small jewellery box hidden there. She wasn't one to wear a lot of jewellery so all she really had was a few chains and one or two pendants her grandmother had given her. She took out a long simple silver chain that she could easily tuck into her school uniform and unclipped the dog-tags. She ran her fingers over the raised letters of his name one more time before hiding them from view. Her mother would never let her hear the end of it if she saw that she had a soldier's dog-tags.

She then went downstairs to find her family was already seated around the table, her father on his phone as usual and her mother making a fresh batch of pancakes. Max slid into a chair beside her baby brother Ari brushing his cheek with her fingers making him grin a toothless smile.

"How did you sleep darling?" Her mother asked placing two pancakes in front of her, she sounded concerned and it took Max a second to realise that it was because of her excuse to go to bed early last night.

"Fine, I think I just needed the rest." Max assured squeezing syrup onto a pancake.

"Alright, I have to go over to Catherine's this afternoon would you mind looking after your brother?" her mom asked wiping her hands on the floral apron she was wearing.

"Sure, we're gonna have lots of fun aren't we?" She tapped Ari's nose making him giggle.

"When is Gran coming to visit?" Ella asked through a mouthful of pancake.

Their mother gave her a stern look and she shut her mouth, "She'll only be here on Tuesday." She told them picking Ari up, "Shouldn't you all be going?" She asked looking pointedly down at her watch.

Max and Ella both jumped up, Max with half a pancake still in hand as they bolted for the door. "Bye mom, bye dad!" They called over their shoulders.

Nudge jumped back in surprise when the girls almost walked straight into her.

"Hi, Nudge!" Ella greeted already running past her, "I have to meet Sasha." She explained waving behind her as she ran.

Nudge laughed and shook her head, pulling her bag up onto her shoulder. "Where's my pancake?" She pouted snatching Max's.

They started walking towards the school talking animatedly about various things and didn't stop until they reached the parking lot. They were stopped however by a group of boys.

"Hey Max." Sam greeted with his usual irritating smirk on his face, Max wanted nothing more than to wipe it off.

"Sam." She agnowledged and moved to sidestep the group only to be stopped by two other boys.

"I hear you were at the camp last night. Were you keeping some soldier company?" He mocked and Max tensed. "Mm, so that's a yes then?" he laughed, "I hope you didn't get too attached Maxie, they're all dead and you know it."

Max turned around slowly keeping her face blank, "Oh I wouldn't talk like that, Sam. You're eighteen right? I give it another two months before you're out there too." She told him sweetly, then she let loose a laugh, "Sorry, I forgot! You're Daddy got you out of military service!" Max gasped as if it had truly slipped her mind and sighed, "At least he's man enough to go out there. I'm betting you wouldn't last two minutes before you started crying for your mommy. If you were your dad wouldn't have to use his connections to get you out." She glanced over at Nudge who was grinning widely and stifling a laugh, the other boys around her were completely silent while Sam's face had turned an unhealthy shade of purple.

He opened and closed his mouth several times unable to come up with something to say to that.  
>"Have a nice day, Sam." She dismissed and this time the boys let her through with Nudge right behind her.<p>

"Wow, someone's testy." Someone chuckled and Max looked over to find Gazzy grinning at her.

Max shrugged, "I can't stand him, he thinks he's better than everyone else." She told them angrily. "Let's go, we're late for class." She urged just as the bell rang.

xXx

"Mom! I'm home!" Max called closing the door and tossing her bag into the corner of the lounge, shrugging out of her blazer and slinging it over the couch. She heard a gurgle from the kitchen and found her mom flitting from table to table picking up various things while Ari watched her from his high chair and chewed on his dummy.

She laughed when her mom jerked in one direction only to quickly correct herself to move in the other.

"What are you looking for?"

Her mother turned to face her with a frustrated expression, "My purse, I put it somewhere and now I can't remember…" She trailed off when Max lifted said purse up from under Ari's nappy. "Oh goodness, thank you darling. I'll be back around five. Bye sugar." Her mom cooed and kissed Ari's head before quickly leaving the house.

**:-) :-) :-)**

xXx

_Dear Fang_

_I had a run in with a boy in my grade yesterday, his name's Sam and he is the most arrogant, self-centred, vain person I've ever met in my life. He'd heard that I was at the camp and decided to mock everyone who's had to be sent into war. _

_He has no right to judge anyone, he's eighteen and should be in there fighting like everyone else but instead he's still living the highlife safe at home because his father managed to pay his way out of military service. I wish he could be sent there it would do him a whole lot of good and show him that he is not above everyone else. _

_My younger sister Ella found out about me going to the camp because I forgot to take off your tags in the morning and has now taken it upon herself to question me about absolutely everything regarding the camp. It's getting quite irritating. _

_Nudge – I pointed her out to you remember?- hasn't shut up about your friend Iggy either so It's been a vicious cycle between dodging Ella's questions and shutting Nudge up long enough to ask for a spare pencil._

_I hope everything is alright, they said there was another bombing on the news today. Were you near it? I hope not, it makes me sick to the stomach to even think you were in the same vicinity. _

_Hope to hear from you soon_

_Keep safe_

_Max_

Max gazed down at the finished letter and chewed on her lip for a few minutes contemplating whether or not she should send it_. He's only been gone a day_ a voice in her mind reasoned but another part wanted to send it because she was worried he had gotten hurt in the bombing. She felt the same wave of nausea that always hit her when she started thinking about that wash over her. She shook her head to clear her thoughts and folded the page neatly and sealed the envelope. _He's perfectly fine, calm down!_ She chastised herself and hopped up fully intending to post the letter now.

There was a soft nock on her door and she looked up just as her mother came in with Ari on her hip and a letter in hand.

Her eyes grew wide and her heart skipped a beat when her mother held the letter out for her, "I honestly don't understand why she insists on sending letters, a simple call would be nice." Her mom shook her head but a smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

Max tried not to let her disappointment show and took the letter. "Gran says letters are how she's always done it and the way she's going to continue doing it."

Her mother laughed which made Ari look up at her curiously and tugged at a lock of her hair, "That sounds about right." She shook her head and left Max with the white envelope.

xXx

It had been a week since she had sent the letter and still she hadn't received a reply. The first few days she'd managed to convince herself that he was probably unable to write and that he would as soon as possible but as two days turned into four and four into six she couldn't bring herself to believe that anymore.

She found herself jumping up to get the mail first thing in the morning and urgently flipping through but it never appeared only feeding her growing worry and fear.

Max's alarm rang loudly and she whimpered shoving her head under her pillow in an attempt to shut the sound out. A further ten minutes later though she gave in and slammed her hand down onto the alarm causing it to crash to the ground.

Max sat up and glared at the broken screen of her clock and grudgingly climbed out of the bed. she was so tempted to just stay in bed all day and sulk but she knew she couldn't do that, her mother would want to know what was wrong and if she was asked Max had no doubt that she'd just break down and tell her about the mysterious soldier she'd met at the camp that her mother had banned her from going to. She stumbled lazily down into the kitchen and dropped into a chair beside her sister who was already dressed and ready for whatever she had planned for the day.

Max considered the fact that she'd set her alarm for a reason but she couldn't bring herself to care about what it was.

Ella eyed Max hesitantly before speaking, "Uhm, Max?"

Max raised her eyebrows at her and poured herself some coffee. "Yeah?" She sighed after taking a big sip of the strong brew.

"Are you really going to let Gran see you like that?"

Max's eyes widened in realisation and she quickly put the cup down. "What time is it?" She demanded.

"Mom's already gone to go fetch her. You have a bout twenty minutes at the most." Ella told her still watching her sister carefully. Something was wrong, that much she knew and she suspected it had something to do with the owner of the dog-tags Max wore everywhere.

Max cursed and ran upstairs to get ready pulling her hair up into a messy bun just as the front door opened.

xXx

It wasn't until after dinner that Max got to speak to her grandmother. Max had been assigned to washing up and the dining room had emptied rather quickly. Her father had drifted off to the couch to watch T.V. and her mom had to change Ari again and Ella had to finish up her homework.

Her gran had offered to help with the dishes and even after Max had refused she still went ahead and picked up half the dirty plates.

"Gran!" Max groaned following her into the kitchen.

Her gran laughed and placed the plates beside the basin with a satisfied grin on her face. "Alright, you've helped." Max sighed wincing when her hands touched the boiling water.

The kitchen was filled with silence for a few minutes, only the sound of sloshing water and the clanking of plates when Max put them on the rack.

Max had settled into the comfortable silence and her thoughts had once again drifted to Fang and if she could quickly slip out to check the mail.

They spent the rest of the evening laughing and sharing stories, of course Max left out Fang and her little trip to the army camp though she desperately wanted to tell her gran but she bit her tongue and held it back. She wasn't going to risk her gran telling her mom.

The next few days were spent shopping with their gran and taking regular trips to the beach, Max's mood had gotten worse and worse as each day passed with no letter to show for it and it was five days later when she was in her room that she was finally cornered.

Max lay on her bed with her earphones in her head bobbing to the music. She felt the bed beside her dip and she opened her eyes in question to find her gran smiling down at her with an evil twinkle in her eyes.

Max pulled out the earphones and sat up smiling. "I thought you were sleeping." She noted.

Her gran chuckled and shook her head, "No, I've been in my room reading. You're mother has been driving me insane."

Max laughed at the admission and the annoyed expression on her gran's face, her own irritation and disappointment momentarily forgotten.

"Yeah, she's been known to do that from time to time." Max shrugged and leaned against her headboard only just noticing something behind her gran's back.

Her gran grinned and held out the envelope, it looked like it had been though hell and back, there were about nine stamps littering the front and dirt turning the once white envelope brown.

Max froze as she stared at it, unsure of what to do. She had a very good idea where it had come from but she still couldn't quite believe it. he'd written to her, which meant he was alive. Thank god! She inwardly cried, unable to stop her hand shooting out to grab the letter. She wanted to rip open the envelope and find out what he had to say but she paused just as she had started to open it finally realising that she wasn't alone in the room.

Her gran was watching her with a secret smile, her hands clasped together on her lap.

Max's heart stopped for a second, she knew she'd given too much away. She'd acted _way _too eager to get the letter and she knew it.

"What's his name?" Her gran enquired cocking her head to the side.

Max contemplated denying it and acting like she didn't know what she was talking about but she knew it would be useless and she felt her shoulders slump. She tugged the tags out from under her shirt and showed them to her gran who was grinning from ear to ear.

"His name's Fang." Max said, "Fang Marks." She clarified, her cheeks heating up. She'd spent an unnatural amount of time tracing the raised letters of his name at night. She knew his full name, his position, his number _and_ his address by heart.

Her gran hummed in response and handed the tags back, "he hasn't written in a while?" She asked gently.

Max cleared her throat wondering if she should tell her gran that this was actually his first letter, "First time actually." She admitted.

Her gran nodded, her grin still in place, "Well then, I will leave you to read." she stood to leave but Max's hand shot out to catch her arm.

"You won't tell mom will you?" She panicked, "She'll kill me!"

Her gran laughed and waved it away, "She won't find out from me, darling. Don't you worry about that. Though I would be a little more careful with the letters. You're father was about to toss it out because of its condition when I saved it."

Max gave her gran a grateful smile and let her go, eager to get to Fang's letter. The second the door clicked shut she tore open the envelope.

_Dear Max_

_I'm sorry that it has taken so long for me to reply to your letter but everything has been too chaotic for me to step away for even a minute. _

_You have a sister? How old is she? Do you have any other siblings? I understand how irritating they can get, I have a sister too. Her name's Allie and she's turning thirteen in June. She's extremely excited to finally be a teenager. I take it her finding out about me wasn't part of the plan? From what Iggy's told me about his letter from Nudge you two were under specific instructions to not go near the camp though I am extremely glad that you decided to. _

_Yes we were near the bomb site but luckily not close enough. We have spent the last few days trying to find any survivors. I honestly wouldn't wish this on anyone not even Sam as bad as he sounds, it redefines the word hell. The suffering is truly unimaginable. Iggy and I were patrolling the bomb site and found a baby crying under a sheet of metal, its mother was beside it. She was dead. _

_I don't have long but I had to send you something to assure you that we're safe and unharmed for now. I will write again as soon as I have some time but I can't guarantee that that'll be soon. _

_Fang_

Max stared at the page, a massive grin spreading across her face. He'd written. He was safe. She dropped back on her bed, clutching the letter tightly to her chest.

– 2 months later –

"Max, could you grab my purse?" Nudge yelled from the bedroom.

Max shook her head and picked up the purse her friend was talking about and ran back up the stairs.

"Have you seen my left shoe?" Nudge enquired hopping around Max's room on one foot.

Max chuckled, "I think it's under the sink in the kitchen."

Nudge paused, her eyes widening when she lost balance and waved her arms around frantically in an effort to stay upright. Once she was certain that she wasn't going to topple over she grinned triumphantly. "Oh yeah!" She then bolted out the room to find her missing heel calling over her shoulder, "Hey! Get dressed! We're leaving in fifteen minutes!"

Max scowled at the thought, her eighteenth birthday and Nudge was taking her to a club. Max hated clubs and her best friend knew that but she'd insisted that they spend one night 'having some fun' as she put it. Max knew there was no way out of it and slipped into the skin-tight black dress Nudge had bought her for her birthday.

Fang's dog-tags jingled and she smiled, running her fingers over his name. It had become a sort of comfort over the last few months. In the two months it had been since she'd met Fang she'd found herself growing even more attached to him. She'd only received a handful of letters but that didn't matter. Every letter brought her closer and closer to him. They'd talk about absolutely everything from their families to which kind of music was better. Now, she wouldn't go as far as to say they agreed about everything. Far from it actually, there was always some sort of debate going on and it always left her laughing with the comments he came up with. They'd made it an unspoken rule between them, the letters would never mention the war, he never spoke about what he saw and she never mentioned the growing threat in the cities. There had been several bombing in nearby towns in the last two weeks and she thought he had enough to worry about without adding her to the list.

"Max! Geeze! What is taking you so long woman! At this rate you'll be nineteen before we get there!" Nudge whined from downstairs.

"I'm coming! Calm down!" Max laughed tugging her hair into a messy bun. She didn't bother to hide the tags in her dress, she only did that when around her mother and there was no doubt in her mind that her mom wouldn't be at the club.

Nudge was banging and clanging downstairs digging through the kitchen drawers for something when Max wandered into the lounge looking for her necklace. The T.V. had been left on from when her parents had left for the evening and Max wasn't paying any attention to the news broadcast. She was digging under the sofa remembering that Ari had wanted to play with it when she heard it.

"…yes, Suzanne, it seems that the casualties to this war will never end." The man speaking paused for a second and then continued in a horrified voice, "It appears that there has been another attack. It seems that Fort Dix…has just been bombed."

Max's whole body tensed, her heart stopped and she felt like her entire body had been thrown into ice.

The second her heart started beating again it worked double-time. she felt her breath coming in short gasps and her mind felt numb.

She distantly heard someone come into the room but she couldn't bring herself to care. She quickly crawled over to the T.V. to listen to the report screaming for them to say it was a mistake or that there had been survivors.

"…no survivors." She dropped to the carpet with a soft thump staring at the screen in disbelieve. Tears coursed down her cheeks as she tried so hard to deny it. no. he was fine, he was alive, she could have misread the letter. But as much as she tried to convince herself it wasn't true she knew she wouldn't be able to. Because she'd received a letter just yesterday telling her that he was coming back. That they were going to be stationed somewhere closer and that he wanted to see her as soon as possible. He'd said he was stationed and Fort Dix. Which had just been bombed.

_He's dead._ The thought rang through her mind with perfect clarity and it brought with it a haze that started to cloud her vision. _He's dead and he's not coming back. He promised he'd come back_. Unable to fight back the darkness – or wanting to really – she let it take over; let herself be consumed by the never ending darkness that reminded her of his eyes, only catching a glimpse of Nudge leaning over her with a terrified expression. _He's dead_.

**Sigh, hate me all you want! Lol! There will be a sequel to this which I'll start working on now. Please review guys! I know it's not as good as War but I really tried. I'm glad I decided not to make this a story, it would have taken too long and honestly I don't think I wouldn't been able to come up with enough stuff to actually keep it going. I decided to quite while I'm ahead. **

**If you loved it REVIEW!  
>If you hated it REVIEW!<br>If you hate me for killing Fang REVIEW!**

**REVIEWS=LUV**

**LUV=INSPIRATION**

**INSPIRATION=STORIES**

**Fangrules**


	2. SEQUEL!

Hey guys! GUESS WAT?

If you guessed that I've finally after over a year got my head out my ass and finished Come Home To Me then you win a virtual cookie! Lol! So yes, the final instalment of this series, _Come Home To Me_, has been put up. so go check that out and rant at me for being a retard and not updating faster. Then you can tell me if I actually pulled it off or not!

you wouldn't believe how hard it was to find a way to end this all but i'm pretty chuffed with the end result

;-)

Fangrules


	3. help !

**Guys, I'm having a crisis. **

**I HAVE NOTHING TO WRITE! **

**Yes, I know that's not totally true since I have _Coming Home To Me_ (_War_ and _Without My Soldier's_ sequel) and _Project Guardian Angel_ to work on but those are both in Third person and actually require some thought to be put into them so I'm about to make an odd request: is there anything you would like me to write? You know, something that you guys would love me to try out or maybe it's an idea you have that you'd like me to write for you? Anything at all, I just need something otherwise I think I'll go mad! **

**If you have an idea REVIEW/PM ME!**

**Fangrules**


	4. Come Home To Me sequel

Hey guys! GUESS WAT?

If you guessed that I've finally after over a year got my head out my ass and finished Come Home To Me then you win a virtual cookie! Lol! So yes, the final instalment of this series, _Come Home To Me_, has been put up. so go check that out and rant at me for being a retard and not updating faster. Then you can tell me if I actually pulled it off or not!

you wouldn't believe how hard it was to find a way to end this all but i'm pretty chuffed with the end result

;-)

Fangrules


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